I was born on June 29th, 1974 on my mothers 20th birthday. She is 58 I am 38. I look like her and act like her and feel we are just one in the same.
Well February of this year she was sitting at a table with friends and us girls, her daughters, drinking wine and enjoying the company. She had a distracted face and she had been feeling her right breast. We asked what was wrong and she stated she felt something a lump and it hurt. This was Friday. We told her not to worry and that she needs to call the Dr first thing on Monday. She was very vigilant about checking and doing self exams. She had checked it on Thursday and there was nothing and now there was something. We all tried to be strong and make her believe that it was nothing she needs not to worry. She had a mammogram that following week then an ultrasound. Me my mom and my three sisters were in the room when they told her it looked malignant and needed a biopsy ASAP. We stood there stunned and cried and sobbed with her. She kept saying “no not cancer! Not me please god not me!” we were still trying to be optimistic for her. She had her biopsy and it was confirmed she had cancer. We were devastated. We did not know what to do. What was she going to do how was she going to handle this. She has to make it she is MOM! It grew in her breast each day and they needed to take it from her. All I thought was please god help my mom through this, make her strong, and guide her through this. She needs help and understanding of why this is happening to her.
Back to the day she found out it was cancer I decided to do a self exam, and there it was a lump on my left breast. I froze. It was and felt like a lemon seed. Hard and small and did not move. My mom’s cancer was big and soft and moved. It had to be a cyst! God please let it be a cyst. I thought this cannot be happening to my family. They are already going through to much. I ran in the living room and had my sister feel it and she said yes get it checked ASAP. I called the Doctor the next morning. I then had a mammogram, which by the way hurt me more than the biopsy; some say it does not hurt mine did; I have implants and they pulled and tugged and smashed and hated it; They scheduled her partial mastectomy to remove the Cancer and any lymph nodes for testing on March 7th, 2013. That day I was scheduled for my ultrasound. Then BAM! They said it looked malignant and needed a biopsy to confirm. So here I am with this news as my mom is getting prepared for surgery. Do I tell her? Do I wait? She will know the minute I walk in her room and how do I not see her before surgery and hug and kiss her and tell her I love her and how proud I am of her. Well I called it. I walked in she said what did they say I said hey momma today is about you and we will sit and talk after your recovery. She said you have cancer don’t you? I said they think so but no worries I think they are wrong. She smiled squeezed my hand and said you got this we got this! Be strong. Here is my mother with IVs in her and she looks more beautiful than I have ever seen her. Her smile trying to make me feel better and she kissed me and said you are going to be okay baby girl. Why was she comforting me when she was going through so much! Not fair! But as they say Cancer does not discriminate. I believe god only gives us as much as we can handle and he must think we are pretty freaking strong!
She came out 2 hours later and looked like she came from a Spa treatment. She was refreshed and happy and came through like a champ! They took all her cancer and 6 lymph nodes from her right breast. She survived!!
I scheduled my biopsy and still in my mind thought “this is a cyst and they are just taking precautions” the Dr doing the biopsy said that it looked closer to a cyst but had to wait for the pathologists test. It was 9mm long and right up against my skin. They were only able to get ½ out.
On March 21st 2013 the Drs office called me to come in they had the results. I was alone because I did not want to burden anyone and truly talked myself into thinking it was just a cyst. As the Doctor said it “your test came back abnormal, you have cancer” it is called Invasive Ductal Carcinoma (IDC). I was silent, I was motionless, I thought about my kids my husband and my hero my mom.
We scheduled my surgery for April 12th, 2013.
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